Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
it's great music for shaving your balls
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
