anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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