You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
