Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Your dad touched me again.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
