FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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