I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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