wakey wakey hands off snakey
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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