Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I pour the whiskey from now on
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize
