I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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