I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I think I sprained my soul last night
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize