Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize
