Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
