Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
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went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
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Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.