that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize