drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
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I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
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I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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