whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
