i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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