I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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