Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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