Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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