ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
