just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize