My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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