is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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