I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
