how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
