uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Quick, to the slutcave!
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
