i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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