I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
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