Are we in a gay sports bar?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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