I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
whose ass print is on the piano?
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
