he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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