we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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