no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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