wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize