in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
