i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
