you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
