ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
