I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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