i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Randomize
