I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
