who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
