just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
What drink are we having for lunch?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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