we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
