Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Randomize
