drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
