am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
