Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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