I'm drive I can fine osifer
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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