angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I AM VODKA MAN
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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