I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize